FIRSTs at 40...

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When I turned 40 last Feb...
I was a little  Incredibly Disappointed.
OPRAH..PROMISED
life would get BETTER after 40...
The day after my 40th birthday.. I was thinking OPRAH was a BIG LIAR..
Better? my ASS..  - I was miserable....
But as the days,rolled into weeks... my life started to change...

FOR THE BETTER...

I remember a few years back(38), thinking that " this is it..." sigh..
might as well give it up... I was feeling OLD & DUMPY.. INVISABLE

I was stuck in a dead-end job, wearing comfortable shoes..... doing the same shit.. week in, week out...

No longer felt like anything more than a mom & a wife...  
 I had lost my mojo.. & didn't think I would be able to get it back....

but somehow.. someway... I did.. I have gotten my MOJO back...
Or at least I am working on it.. and wondering if 40 REALLY is the new 30?
Instead of dwelling on my glory days...
I am pretty sure I have many more AWESOME experiences ahead of me...

I am learning new things everyday...
&  I think FINALLY, I am gaining the ever ELUSIVE  CONFIDENCE of which Oprah spoke.

at 40... I landed THE JOB I would have never had the guts to go after at lets say..39.

I guess I figured.. what the hell... I got nothing to lose.. GO FOR IT.. -& I GOT it..
This isn't a post about...WOW.. my life is FABULOUS... because it isn't
I deal with most of the same crap I was dealing with last year... 
It is just now.. I can see all of the fabulous opportunities...
that this time last year.. I thought they had passed me by...  

OK... what started this little rant POST?
I got the proofs back from my FIRST PHOTO SHOOT..
They took shots for next years catalog...  
OK, don't laugh.. I think it is kindda cool...



OK.. so you can think I am a DORK... I am...
 but sometimes I have to shake my head at all of my FIRSTS at 40... 
In the past few months.. I have helped put together make-up & fashion shows,
 I have given presentations to 200 people.. in Norwegian.. (yea me!)
Have actually called UNCLE & passed up an international business trip..
I finally understand what Bjørn was talking about
when he was traveling NON-STOP & just wanted to be at HOME...
I have let go of bad relationships.. & reached out to those I have lost contact with..
I still have a lot of growing to do...
But I feel like at 40- I am finally finding my voice 
& TRYING to mean what I say & say what I mean...

I didn't have a problem turing 30...
I knew that I was SMARTER,Better Looking & had more money then I was at lets say...20..
But 40 was hard...
After looking back over the past few months..
 I think I can eat a little HUMBLE PIE & apologize to Oprah for ever doubting her...
I am really looking forward to seeing what the rest of the year holds... 
So all of y'all who feel JUST LIKE I DID....
Don't...
just do something different...

get out of your rut & go for it!


Comments

Anonymous said…
i get SO happy reading this and alot of it is b/c when i first began reading your blog, i could feel that there was something big waiting for you after all the time and patience you had exuded throughout your time being in a foreign land. but i knew you were happy, but not hitting your potential of happiness. and now i KNOW you have. you 100% inspire me to not give up even though i apply and apply and get flustered with the language, etc. i really appreciate your ability to share reality from a genuine perspective and tell me "it wasn't easy". but, as i can tell, it was DEFINITELY worth it :)
October 26, 2011 at 10:19 PM
jaymo said…
Great post as usual. It's all in your attitude, handling age that is, and I think you've got a good attitude working!
October 26, 2011 at 11:59 PM
Kelly said…
May be there is hope for me after all? It seems like I've been in the same rut for quite a bit without a light at the end of the tunnel....

You make me so proud! I am so happy for you and all your accomplishments and new adventures - I've always thought you rock!!

XXOO
October 27, 2011 at 1:54 AM
Tiffany said…
Wow!! 40 looks good on you! Impressive accomplishments and outlook. Glad to know it's not over for me in 5 years! :)
October 27, 2011 at 3:09 AM
Suldog said…
Well, if you don't mind an off-hand comment from a relative stranger, I think you look fabulous and your new attitude is exactly what will KEEP you looking fabulous. Confidence and happiness are tres sexy!
October 27, 2011 at 2:19 PM
Kelley with Amy's Angels said…
I turn the big 4-0 in late November and have been DREADING IT. I still think of my parents as 40...and to think that you're as old as your parents...well, that just makes you feel OLD.

But let's face it. You can't stop time. And to dwell over the fact that you're a certain age can make you feel in a rut, down and out. So, I'm doing my best to embrace it (though, it's still hard...).
October 27, 2011 at 3:27 PM
Alexandra Rose said…
You make 40 look good! And it sounds like you're having a blast too. Congrats on the job, I hope you're enjoying every minute of it.
http://beingmama.com/
http://ohsoprettylife.blogspot.com/
October 28, 2011 at 10:03 AM
Caren with a "C" said…
Good thoughts! I hit 40 this year too. I'm kind of feeling like you did, but now I think you've made me realize that now I can say I'm "experienced", not old. I'm going to start working on my image as I've got into a rut with the crop pant jeans, polo shirts, and pony tails. Thanks for the pep talk!
October 28, 2011 at 11:10 AM
sarah - dodeline design said…
What a great post! So glad things are looking up - work it girl!
October 28, 2011 at 2:31 PM
Sharon at Momof6 said…
You are SO right! I turned (gasp) 45 this past summer, and I really do feel like I am just getting my groove-on! My life is really busy, but full, and happy! I am doing things that I love to do, and feeling good about where I am with my life too!
Thanks for this post! I am so glad that I found your blog- thanks for stopping by Momof6 too!
October 28, 2011 at 5:32 PM
Kelli Nørgaard said…
Girl, Oprah lied.
40 was awful. I FELL APART! but 41... it all started getting better.. I PROMISE! Hang on till Feb!

And that new photo of you is awesome. I asked Mads to look at it and tell me what nationality he thought you were... he said ICELANDIC! :-) Does that mean that after I have lived here as long as you have, I will look LESS AMerican and more Nordic????
October 28, 2011 at 9:19 PM
Sorta Southern Single Mom said…
Girl, you look Fabulous! Sound it to. I've felt that way about turning 30 and my 30's thus far. Mostly because my divorce was finalized three weeks before I turned 30, so I've had to do a lot of rebuilding over the last 5 years and often feel like, "Is this really how the rest of my life is going to go?" Baby steps. I'm happy, just not fulfilled and content yet, but I'm getting there.
October 29, 2011 at 2:12 PM
Debie Napoleon said…
My forties were a time of change with so many ups and downs, that I am happy to be on the other side. I say 50's are fabulous too!
So enjoy your 40's and may I say, you look amazing!
October 29, 2011 at 2:17 PM
Melissa said…
You look amazing! I am fast approaching forty and I am in that rut you speak of! Feeling old and frumpy. I hope that I get my groove back soon! Your post gives me hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel!
November 1, 2011 at 2:25 PM
The Blonde Duck said…
I hope to be as cool as you at 40!
November 2, 2011 at 12:14 PM
Leah said…
40 looks Fab on you! Glad to know that the happiness in your heart matches the glow on your face...
November 2, 2011 at 8:55 PM
Anonymous said…
Congratulations! Your pictures are great! Love hearing happy things, and that 40 isn't so bad (I joined the club in June). I'm working on "getting the MOJO" and getting out of my rut as well....Thanks for the inspiration! (PS. I finally saw your HHI episode...I didn't think you were a bitch at all. However, I have to add the "garbage disposal" has become a big joke at Casa de Thomas)
November 4, 2011 at 11:18 PM
Anonymous said…
Så bra innlegg!! :) Håper virkelig jeg ser like fresh ut som deg, når jeg fyller 40 år :) Man er ikke eldre enn man føler seg ;)
November 9, 2011 at 10:48 PM
LinnieAlexis said…
Oh this is fun! I remember you from a class I'm taking! I'm a student at NISS, and you had a class there through Oriflame! It's good to see you got the job you wanted, and remember that life only just began! I wish you all the best things in life~
November 10, 2011 at 3:57 PM
Girl in Carolina said…
Can I just say - you look HOT! And I turn 40 in 2 years and this makes me feel so much better. I feel stuck in a rut right now too and just need some changes. Being single makes me feel like a loser at 40 too. Can you say crazy cat lady?? HAHA Anyways you inspire me so much! You look beautiful and most importantly - HAPPY.
March 15, 2012 at 5:47 PM
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